“Bye, bitch!” Lindsey Lanham said as she waved goodbye to the newly convicted felon. “Cut it out,” her older sister, Lauren Lanham, whispered as she shot a dirty look at Lindsey. To keep decorum in court, Lauren did not react in the same manner as her sister did, even though she felt the same way. 

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After an exhausting two-year trial, the courtroom, which was typically filled with pain, anger, and sadness, was now filled with tears of happiness. It was Oct. 22, 2021, and the musky, old, white courtroom was unusually full. Due to COVID protocols, Stacy Spejewski was usually only allowed one family member to accompany her during those long days in court. However, today was a special day. Instead of just one family member, Stacy was joined by her second husband, Mark Spejewski, and her two daughters, Lauren and Lindsey Lanham. Additional friends and family waited on the courthouse lawn to hear the verdict. The group was there to support the family if the verdict was not guilty or to celebrate if justice was finally served. 

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Regardless of the outcome, it would be a day the Lanham family would never forget, for it was the day their youngest daughter’s murderer would be sentenced and their healing journey could finally begin.

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Molley Renee Lanham was born on Jan. 5, 2000. Raised in Valparaiso, Indiana, Molley was a girl who loved fashion, animals, and being a sister. As the youngest of the Lanham trio, Molley knew the true value of sisterhood. If one of her sisters called the other a nasty name, Molley would say something about it because nobody was going to talk to her sister like that — not even the other member of the trio. However, this kindness was not reserved exclusively for her sisters, as Molley was always standing up for the little guy. While in school, she would routinely be seen calling out bullies and taking new students under her wing. While she had her sassy, sarcastic side, Molley was known for her warm, goofy, passionate side. Animals were her first love. A few months before she passed, Molley had adopted two cats, one behind her mother’s back, because they needed her help and she needed to help them. That’s just who she was. 

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At the start of 2019, life was great. Molley had graduated from high school the previous year and planned to work in the public health sector, helping those who struggle with mental health issues. While Molley had her own struggles, she felt it was her purpose in life to help others. To celebrate Molley’s graduation, Molley, her sisters, and their mother took a trip to New York City. The vacation was filled with laughter, love and sisterhood. The trip was unforgettable; however, it would be the last trip the girls all took together. 

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On Feb. 24, Molley and her friend Thomas Grill had arrived home from a trip to Denver, Colorado. Molley had agreed to drive Thomas since his license was suspended. While in Denver, Thomas had purchased a large quantity of THC cartridges to bring home to Indiana, where possession of marijuana is a federal crime. When they returned to Indiana, Thomas planned to meet up with Conner Kerner, a high school senior he had met for previous drug deals. Conner owed Thomas $15,000, and they planned to settle the debt that night. However, Conner did not have the money for Thomas, so they decided to meet the following day. 

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On the morning of Feb. 25, 2019, Molley drove Thomas in her black Honda Civic to Conner’s grandparents' home in Hebron, Indiana. Conner left Hebron High School around 10:15 a.m. with classmate John Silva to meet the couple at the house. Conner’s grandparents were out of town, so Conner and John had the house to themselves. 

Although Thomas and Conner had agreed to settle Conner’s debt, they were both planning on robbing the other.

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When Molley and Thomas arrived, Molley waited in the car as Thomas walked into the garage to meet with Conner. Unbeknownst to Thomas, John waited inside the house by the garage door, armed with Conner’s grandfather’s 9mm handgun. Conner himself was armed with his mother’s Glock 43 handgun. When Thomas entered the garage, Conner fired six shots at him, striking him at least once. 

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“Get the fuck up!” Conner shouted as Thomas begged for his life. Conner tried to shoot him again, but he had run out of bullets. 

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“Ugh, this motherfucker won’t die,” Conner said to himself as he searched for a new weapon. He found a wrench that was nearby and started to beat Thomas to death with it. 

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After Thomas died, Conner walked down the worn-down, cracked driveway and up to Molley’s car. He instructed her to get out and follow him into the garage. He proceeded to show her Thomas’s lifeless body.

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“This is what I’m going to do if you tell anyone what I did. This is going to be you,” Conner shouted as Molley began to beg for her life. Initially, Conner agreed to let her go, and Molley started to walk back to her car. As Conner found more bullets, he panicked and quickly changed his mind. Conner then shot Molley twice, once in the back of her head and once in her spine, killing her instantly. 

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It would take almost a full week before police could find the bodies of Molley Lanham and Thomas Grill. 

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After not coming home or answering any text messages, Thomas’s mother, Patricia Grill, her two sons, and Lindsey Lanham went to the Valparaiso police station to report the missing duo. Molley’s mother and stepfather were on vacation in Florida, and Molley’s oldest sister, Lauren, was in California. Upon hearing that Molley was reported missing, Stacy and Mark immediately flew home. The two families started their own search parties to try and locate Molley and Thomas. 

 

Friends and family came to help from far and wide when they learned that Molley was missing. The “home base” for the search party was at the home of longtime family friends, the Polizottos. The Polizotto house was located in Hobart, Indiana, which was a central location for the search.  The team of family and friends did everything they could to find Molley. 

 

The news came on March 2, 2019, five days after Molley and Thomas were murdered. The police had used the information they received from Conner’s girlfriend, Holly Letnich, to locate Molley’s car. Conner had taken the car and the two lifeless bodies two miles into a wooded area behind his grandparents’ house and lit everything on fire. 

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The police found the skeletal remains of Molley and Thomas, having used dental records to properly identify the duo. 

After Molley and Thomas were found, the police had to deliver the worst news.  Unfortunately, Molley’s family was not together when the police contacted them. Stacy and Mark were driving around looking for her. Lauren was still in California. Lindsey was thankfully at home base, where she and a group of family friends had gone to take a break from their search. The news drove everyone to rush to the Polizotto house so they could process the unbelievable news together. Broken and numb, the Lanham family tried to get through their new reality. 

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Death is hard for any family. However, families of homicide victims go through a more complicated version of grief due to the legality of it all.

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“We couldn’t plan the funeral part until after [Molley] was released from the coroner…because they were building a case,” Lauren said as she recounted the days after Molley’s passing. Fortunately, the family was able to plan a wake for Molley.

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The wake was held on March 12, 2019, ten days after Molley was found. The large funeral home was filled with people and tears. Over a dozen picture boards filled the visitation room. The happiest moments of Molley’s life were spread across the boards: pictures of Molley playing soccer, laughing with friends, wearing stylish outfits, playing with her cats, and hanging with her family. Her sisters and family friends wore rosaries around their necks, a nod to a fashion trend that Molley had started, despite it being considered disrespectful in the Catholic faith to wear a rosary as a necklace. There was a heavy veil of sadness and anger over the funeral home. The Lanhams numbly stood in the receiving line, still in disbelief at what had happened. Molley’s mother was but a shell of a woman. 

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Her eyes were filled with nothing but pain and emptiness, for how can a mother go on after losing her baby? 

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In the weeks following the wake, the Lanhams felt like zombies. They tried to make sense of their new normal. To feel something, the family decided to try something new; they decided to get tattoos.

 

Growing up, Molley had always wanted a tattoo. “She didn’t have any, like, legit tattoos. And I say legit because she never went to a tattoo parlor, but she had some stick and pokes,” Lindsey explained. 

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Years prior, the trio had made a promise to Molley in regard to tattoos. “We always talked about going to Vegas for Molley’s 21st birthday and getting matching tattoos,” Lauren expressed, “So I think [getting tattoos] was like an ode to that as well. We joked about how pissed she would have been, like ‘I cannot believe they got tattoos!’”

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The design was an ‘M’ in the middle of angel wings. The family agreed to get the tattoo in the same spot. They had originally decided to get the design on their wrists. However, on the way to the tattoo parlor, Stacy changed her mind. 

 

“My mom was like ‘I think I want it on my heart’ and we were like ‘Oh okay, we all said we were going to get the same thing. No backing out now,’” Lauren said as she laughed. “I don’t know if she always knew that she wanted it there and just kind of bamboozled us, or if it was a spur-of-the-moment decision.” Regardless, everyone got their tattoo over their heart. 

 

After the tattoos, the Lanhams returned to their overwhelming lives. Lying on the couch filled with grief and watching movies day after day with her mother and sister became too much for Lauren.  So she came up with a plan: a ladies' road trip. The destination: The Grand Canyon. 

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While Lindsey hated the long drive, Lauren found the experience of looking out over the big, beautiful canyon to be therapeutic. 

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“I needed to be a part of something bigger than myself,” Lauren explained. “The Grand Canyon is this big, you know, magical, mystical place because it’s just nothing else out there. I needed to be surrounded by that.” 

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When the ladies returned home from their trip, it was time for the next step. Interrupted by COVID-19, Conner Kerner’s trial began in May 2019 and lasted until October 2021. His accomplice, John Silva, did not have as lengthy a trial. His trial ended in a mistrial when the jury could not come to a unanimous decision, and John decided to take a plea deal to avoid another trial. John Silva was then sentenced to 20 years in prison for voluntary manslaughter with 10 years of probation. The earliest John can get out of prison is on May 21, 2035. 

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 While those endless days of Conner’s trial were stressful, confusing, and emotionally draining for the Lanhams, it made them feel closer to Molley. “We were constantly needing to go to court to talk about what happened to Molley. So yes, although we always had this constant reminder of what happened, but it was also an opportunity to talk about Molley,” Lindsey said.

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Finally, on Oct. 21, 2021, justice was served. 

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There was a sense of relief that washed over the courtroom as the jury foreperson read the verdict, “We, the jury, in the case of Conner Kerner vs. The State of Indiana, find the defendant guilty of both counts of felony murder, both counts of felony attempted robbery, and felony arson.”  

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Conner Kerner was originally sentenced to 179 years, but after an appeal, his sentence was reduced to 154 years. 

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“When they read their verdicts of guilty, you could almost feel this part of stress coming off of you because they found this person accountable… Not that you need someone to validate your feelings in that moment, but it is validating to know that you can find 12 strangers and they can all agree,” Lauren expressed, “Like they know what he did. He did do these things, and he was never going to live any type of normal life on the outside world again.”

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After the trial was finished, it was time to find a way to honor Molley. For almost three years, all the focus was on the worst day of Molly’s life rather than on who she was as a person. Before Molley passed, both Lauren and Lindsey were on track to become lawyers. However, after sitting through their youngest sister’s trial, the sisters changed their paths to become prosecutors. Now, over six years after Molley passed, the sisters work together at the Lake County Prosecutors' Office. 

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“So I ended up taking the bar in February on the day that Molley passed. My first day, Feb. 25, was the sixth anniversary,” Lauren said, “It’s like, I don’t know if I believe in, you know, ‘they’re always with you’ before Molley, but it was weird, I truly did feel like she was there with me.” 

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Being prosecutors not only brought the sisters closer to Molley but also to a community of people whose lives have also been affected by gun violence and homicide. 

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“And honestly, like, dealing with all of these people regularly, like, every single day, who have gone through what I've gone through is both validating because I'm like, ‘Okay, this is like, unfortunately, a normal experience.’ And all these other people are like getting through it and they're doing great,” Lindsey expressed, “Like, I can do it too. But it's also scary how normal it is.” 

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While her daughters chose to honor Molley through a legal path, Stacy decided to honor her youngest daughter differently. After Molley passed, Stacy joined some local support groups for parents who had lost their children. While it was great to have a place to talk through her grief, Stacy felt that it was not the right group for her. 

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“It was hard for my mom to go to these support groups and feel supported. Homicide is such a taboo topic,” Lauren explained, “And then also it was just such a unique loss and it's like you kind of just need to talk to other people who have gone through that type of loss because it's also you're dealing with the criminal component as well as it, which is also very frustrating and confusing.”

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So with the help of her family and friends, Stacy started the Molley Lanham Foundation. The foundation’s mission is to provide a healing space for those suffering from homicide loss, particularly gun violence. The foundation assists families in Lake, Porter and LaPorte counties with their victim advocacy units. Recently, the foundation was able to raise enough money to create a comfort room at the Porter County Courthouse. The room acts as a space for families to go during their trials to step away, grab a snack, drink some water and take a break from their emotional day. The room is also a place for the families to keep their items while they go into the courtroom since no bags, phones or personal items are allowed in the courtroom. 

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As for upcoming projects, the foundation plans to build a memorial garden for homicide victims, a place where families and friends of the victims can go to remember and honor their loved ones. The foundation also hosts two annual events, a butterfly release for homicide victims and a charity golf outing.  Additionally, Stacy is in the early stages of a grief guidebook for families of homicide victims to follow. The book will include a step-by-step guide to funeral arrangements, the contact information of advocates in the area and a guide as to what to expect during the trial. 

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In the six years since Molley passed, the Lanham family has found a way to live with their grief. They have all shifted their paths to focus on guiding other families of homicide victims through the complicated grief journey. As advocates, one of the biggest changes the family wants to make is how others view deaths caused by homicide. The general public struggles to discuss such a taboo subject, especially when the victim does not fit the stereotype of a homicide victim. Unfortunately, homicides, specifically gun-related homicides, are more common than people think. In Indiana alone, there have been at least 4,643 people who have died as a result of gun violence between 2014 and 2024.  People do not want to talk about homicide or gun-related deaths but talking about the problem is the first step to fixing it. 

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“I mean, my family was just a normal family. But this happens all the time,”  Lindsey expressed. “When you sweep it under the rug because it’s a negative thing, you don’t bring awareness to the violence happening in our community.” 

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While gun control is a controversial topic in the United States, it’s not a complicated issue for the families of gun violence victims. Those families are left with the pain and grief of losing their loved ones while also having to go through an expensive and confusing legal system. As the country argues on, these families learn to move forward and try to get used to their new, unthinkable reality. 

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“It's like you have a vision of maybe your life was going to go with that person. I mean, it's totally different now, but that doesn't mean they're removed from the photo,” Lauren explained. “You just have to rearrange how they fit in.”